Get Used to It

I’m part of the Queer community, not the LGBT community.

The LGBT community has routinely dismissed my gender, my presentation, my sexuality, my romanticism, my entire being and identity.

The Queer community, on the other hand, is where I’ve been able to learn about people like me, about our foreparents’ struggles and their sacrifices, about being proud to be who I am, and how to fight back against gatekeepers from all sides who want to define me on their terms.

If I had had the Queer community five years ago, I would’ve been so much healthier.  But no, I had the LGBT community, who said asexuals didn’t exist, who said my gender didn’t exist, who said everyone was gay and there was no other side than straight.

That LGBT community who decided that anyone who identifies as queer is actually hurting everyone else.  That not stepping in like to follow the Good Gays means that you want them to suffer.  That asexuals don’t face any kind of discrimination and never have and also were only invented twelve years ago, obviously.

Because maiden aunts and bachelor uncles never existed.  Because spinsters were all lesbian and any man not married was gay.  (Because bisexuals don’t exist either, obviously.)  Because asexuality AND having no sex drive mean we’re making it hard for everybody else.  Because Allies are just closeted gay people and asexuals are taking that from them and hurting their feelings.  Because god forbid they not be considered separate from LGBT.  Because if you’re not with us, you’re against us, even if we have to use the same kind of societal rhetoric that society uses against us.

So I’m fucking done.

If you’re part of the LGBT community and happy to be party to that bullshit, feel free.  Especially to do it far away from me, because I’m not here for you.  I’m not here for identity policing and gatekeeping and judging how much X has suffered and if that means they’re Genuine Gay.

I’m not here for it or you.

I’m here, I’m queer, and I’ll be damned if y’all try and take that from me.  My community is welcoming and positive and it sure as shit doesn’t focus on cis gay guys or the “cool” lesbians.  My community is intersectional and sits the fuck down and learns when it’s done some shit wrong.

I’m not gay as in happy, I’m queer as in fuck you.

About Fleet Sparrow

Writer, Reader, Critic, Bear.
This entry was posted in Fleet Gets Personal, Queer as Fuck and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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