Space Ghost, Impopsters, and Batman, oh my!

ngl, friends, you’re gonna see a few of these posts go up about every week.  You see, being a broke blogger means I’ve gotta make some kind of cash somewhere, so when I saw the offer to be an affiliate for Entertainment Earth (my life), I jumped at it.

BUT!!!  lbr, I also have the best taste in all things toy, so this is a giant win/win for everyone.

If there’s a collectable you want, hit me up and I’ll get you my affiliate link.  Doesn’t cost you anything extra, but it’ll kick some commission cash over to me (and you love me, y/y??).

All that out of the way,

HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THESE POPS I’M FUCKING DYING

First, the newly added Space Ghost.

I’m ngl, I made some noises about this one (because Hanna-Barbera owns my childhood).

Space Ghost Pop! Vinyl Figure

My second favorite thing about him is that, to get the slanted lens, he now just looks 78% done.

Next!  The Impopsters.

As soon as these went up my heart just about died.  Like, Arkham Rogues are my shit, as y’all know, and now all in Bat costumes all I can think of is some sort of villain costume party where everyone ended up as the same characters.  “What?  You’re Batman too????”

(Also, lbr, this’ll be the closest most of us get to owning a Two-Face Pop since they were discontinued twelve yonks ago.)

Batman Impopster Riddler Pop! Vinyl Figure Batman Impopster Two-Face Pop! Vinyl Figure Batman Impopster Penguin Pop! Vinyl Figure
Batman Impopster Scarecrow Pop! Vinyl Figure Batman Impopster Batgirl Poison Ivy Pop! Vinyl Figure Batman Impopster Batgirl Harley Quinn Pop! Vinyl Figure Batman Impopster Batman Harley Quinn Pop! Vinyl Figure

scurcrooooooooooooooooooooooo

I won’t lie, I don’t really see the point for two Harley Pops probably because I’m so fucking Harley’d out but they both look legit, so I’ll let it pass.

I’ve already pre-ordered mine (b/c I have impulse problems and OH MY GOD JUST LOOK AT THEM!!!), but I think they’re ones you’ll want to pre-order because I see a mad rush coming for them once they’re out.

EE Exclusive ’50s Batman.

Batman 1950s Comic Pop! Heroes Vinyl Figure - EE Exclusive

I’ve got this little guy, and he’s so frickin’ adorable.  His eyebrows, I can’t.

(Tip:  I’m always on the lookout for Not Mint deals, b/c all it means is a box has been scrunched or open but the figure is fine.  They’ll knock a couple bucks off for it, so I highly recommend buying that way (how I got mine, in fact).  I can get you links for those, too, so hmu.)

This next one is just for fun because omg it’s Muppetcrow!!

Batman The Animated Series Scarecrow Bust

Be still, my weird little heart.

There are tons of these busts.

The Animated Series:

The ’66 show

Even…. MillerBats.

All kinds.

(The busts are pricey, but better than at cons???)

Anyhow, wow, this was a ton of work, but the tl;dr:

Let me know what you wanna buy and I’ll supply you with linkage. (Also upcoming Tokyo Otaku Mode affiliate links, so for all y’all plushie fans and weeabo trash, I got you.)

Thanks so much in advance and love y’all!

 

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Get Used to It

I’m part of the Queer community, not the LGBT community.

The LGBT community has routinely dismissed my gender, my presentation, my sexuality, my romanticism, my entire being and identity.

The Queer community, on the other hand, is where I’ve been able to learn about people like me, about our foreparents’ struggles and their sacrifices, about being proud to be who I am, and how to fight back against gatekeepers from all sides who want to define me on their terms.

If I had had the Queer community five years ago, I would’ve been so much healthier.  But no, I had the LGBT community, who said asexuals didn’t exist, who said my gender didn’t exist, who said everyone was gay and there was no other side than straight.

That LGBT community who decided that anyone who identifies as queer is actually hurting everyone else.  That not stepping in like to follow the Good Gays means that you want them to suffer.  That asexuals don’t face any kind of discrimination and never have and also were only invented twelve years ago, obviously.

Because maiden aunts and bachelor uncles never existed.  Because spinsters were all lesbian and any man not married was gay.  (Because bisexuals don’t exist either, obviously.)  Because asexuality AND having no sex drive mean we’re making it hard for everybody else.  Because Allies are just closeted gay people and asexuals are taking that from them and hurting their feelings.  Because god forbid they not be considered separate from LGBT.  Because if you’re not with us, you’re against us, even if we have to use the same kind of societal rhetoric that society uses against us.

So I’m fucking done.

If you’re part of the LGBT community and happy to be party to that bullshit, feel free.  Especially to do it far away from me, because I’m not here for you.  I’m not here for identity policing and gatekeeping and judging how much X has suffered and if that means they’re Genuine Gay.

I’m not here for it or you.

I’m here, I’m queer, and I’ll be damned if y’all try and take that from me.  My community is welcoming and positive and it sure as shit doesn’t focus on cis gay guys or the “cool” lesbians.  My community is intersectional and sits the fuck down and learns when it’s done some shit wrong.

I’m not gay as in happy, I’m queer as in fuck you.

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Weekly? Update

Quick progress update (I need to figure out how to cross-post to DW and LJ, help me computer friends!).

This starts (roughly) the second week (more or less) of my attempt at Story A Day In May!  And so far things have been very good.  I’ve written some sort of complete story for 10 days straight.  Some have been short (two words), some have been fucking ridiculous (2,087 words of not even fully finished fic but fuck you that’s what notes are for).  It’s been scary (I actually whited-out a whole story because too close to home rn) and been fun (that giant fucking fic omg I actually love it).  But most of all, it’s been a challenge I’ve been able to meet and accomplish every day.  I haven’t had a consistent output since school so this is very exciting.

DONE

  • Fandom For Mental Health banner
  • Been reading a lot more, holy shit it’s been amazing
  • Fucked up my life by buying endless books and toys to make me happy

OK, when put like that, it’s not great, but still….

DOING

  • WIPBB Bruce/Dick
  • UC TigerDick
  • UC Helena/Dick
  • DCBB because I’m a fucking moron (but I’m soloing so less pressure tbh)

Still on plan for fics, but now I’ve got the first pressure off me (and another b/c one of the BB I was doing has to reschedule due to life, so yay!)  I’m really hoping to have something for POC Destroy Horror, but I’m not gonna break myself to do it since it ends in 5 days (or the solarpunk story I’d started yonks ago).  I might have something for POCD Fantasy, but I haven’t written fantasy in so long, that’s probably not gonna happen.  But who knows?

That’s me up through June, but I’ll try to update here more often with fun things.

In other news, I’ll probably start using here and DW for book reviews/commentary/live reads because I’ve got a lot I want to read and finally the drive to do it again.

READING

  • Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, because I’m a slut for British mystery homoeroticism
  • The Invisible Library, an ARC from Penguin Random House
  • The Mysterious Mr. Quin

So far I’ve only read the author’s note for Tinker, but I’ve started Library and the first chapter was very fun.  Hopefully that will keep up in the rest of it.  As for Mr. Quin, I’m just working my way through his short stories because I have such a boner for possibly-fae, homoerotic mystery men who appear only when they’re needed.

More on those to come as I continue.

I’ll probably do some of my live-reading on twitter because it’s the only social media I go on nowadays, so hit me up there for snarky commentary and bullshit ideas.  I’ll try to compile them all at some point after to write a more solid review.

That’s it for right now.  I’m rewatching Foyle’s War because I hate myself for this pain but love seeing people get dragged, so I’m basically rewatching the same episodes until I can will myself to move to the next season (S2 is when my tragic gay dies and there’s no fix-it fic and I’M NOT CRYING WE’RE ALL CRYING)

BTW, I’m always looking for new recs, books, TV, movies, games….  Hit me up if there’s anything you’ve read/seen that you’re like DAMN GET ON THIS b/c I probably will.

Posted in Fleet Gets Personal, Fleet Status Report | Tagged , | 1 Comment

OH SHIT, ZIE LIVES

Hello, yes, I’m alive, it’s amazing.

Just wanted to do a quick update on what I’ve been doing and what I’m going to be doing in the not too distant future somewhere in time and space.

DONE

  • Fandom for Mental Health fic
  • Set up a calendar of due dates
  • Have really heavy déjà vu while writing this
  • Won Camp NaNo (5,000 words for April)
  • Wrote very first Rex/Andrew fic, yay!

DOING

  • 1,500 word Helena Bertinelli fic
  • Commission 2 for St00pz (from 12,000 years ago)
  • Editing written fics
  • Unconventional Courtship TigerDick fic
  • Unconventional Courtship Helena/Dick fic (gonna be long I feel)
  • DCBB, possibly Lena Luthor ???
  • BDSM BB, probably secret Bruce/Dick fic (or H/D maybe)
  • Trope Bingo, holy shit, I always forget this!!!

LIKE TO DO

  • Finish up the three drafts saved here
  • Write original fic for submission somewhere
  • Get job????

I was going to try to do something for the POC Destroy Horror/Fantasy, something maybe to do with the disconnect from the culture of birthright, but I think now’s not the time.  I’ve a lot of things to be writing and reading.

After the big fic challenges are done, I’m going to be diving into starting a novel about WWII RAF pilots in love and their experiences through the war and being together (in a lowkey better history, but with plenty of sound historical facts).  I may post snippets of it as I go (or just end up writing offshoots for Foyle’s War fandom).  I’m very excited to start a project like this, as I haven’t worked on anything novel-like in years.

That about covers it for now.

BTW, I’m always open to do proofing and/or editing work, fanfic commissions, and character advice (in general, or specifically asexual, autistic, queer).  Plus, I make really excellent Perler Bead creations, so if that’s something you like *finger pistols*  Message me for rates.

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Brandy invites you to check out the Amazon App and get $5

Use my referral link to get a $5 coupon at Amazon for signing into the Amazon App the first time: https://amazon.com/mpr?referralcode=BRAND47087N&ref_=mpr_tr_ss

Because I need money and you do too.

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URBAN FANTASY 101 – GENTRY-FICATION

Stitch's avatarStitch's Media Mix

urban fantasy 101 - gentry fication

In 2010, Black people from across the diaspora made up just over 32% of Chicago’s population.

But I bet you couldn’t tell that from reading Jim Butcher’s Dresden Files or Chloe Neill’s Chicagoland Vampires series where there are zero main characters who are Black and few recurring characters who are explicitly “of color” in the respective series.

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[Signal Boost] New Beginning for Homeless Mom

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Help Zina H make it to grad school!

Please help my friend if you can. They’re an absolute treasure and very dear friend. I’ve reblogged several of their posts already because they’re always so on point, so if you have some to spare, please help out!

Stitch's avatarStitch's Media Mix

1451247423693.jpg

Help me make it to grad school!

I’ve wanted to go to grad school since the moment that I graduated from FIU (Florida International University) in 2012. Unfortunately, life didn’t go as planned and I spent the next few years trying to make things work for me in the workforce.

In September, I decided to apply at my alma mater for grad school. I didn’t go with the history department again I decided to go with the English department for an MA in Literature because much of what I’ve been doing in my spare time has revolved around media analysis and looking at things like race and gender.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get in the way I had planned. Instead of being admitted immediately, I was at first told that I would have to defer my enrollment to the Fall 2016 semester while I took two classes (which would’ve come up…

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On Grayson, fandom, problematic media, and the drive to “defend” popular male characters

Stitch's avatarStitch's Media Mix

Content notes: This post mentions and/or links to descriptions of sexual assault and harassment as well as racism.


Grayson Header.png

If you were to listen to a certain group of Dick Grayson fans on the internet, you’d probably come to the conclusion that comic book fans are frighteningly intense and that the Grayson series (written by Tom King and Tim Seeley with pencils by Mikel Janin and colors by Jeromy Cox) is rife with orgies and plagued with issues of consent on every single page as Dick is forcibly separated from his friends and family to fight in the war against SPYRAL.

If you were to listen to that weirdly vocal group of fans, you’d also be just as wrong as they are.

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The Techniques of Erasure

A perfect write up.

Stitch's avatarStitch's Media Mix

Word Cloud - Techniques of Erasure

This is part one of a hybrid essay-rant series focusing on fandom (the collective community) and its intense race/racism problems. If you’re new to my blog and to this project, start here with the introduction post. Make sure to click the links and read the content because they’ll add further nuance to the essay here.

In addition to talking about race and racism, this post also mentions incest (with regard to how fandom interprets familial relationships to suit their shipping needs).


One thing that becomes overwhelmingly clear when it comes to the treatment of characters of color is the lengths that fandom is willing to go to in order to get them out of the way of their favorite white character ships. There are so many techniques that we could tackle, many of them framed subtly enough that it’s difficult to combat them, but for the purposes of this…

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Cabbage Baby

You take a deep breath, bracing yourself before opening the door, pained but polite smile in place.
>No one

Well.  That’s more than a little spooky.
>Look down

Oh?  What’s this?
>Examine thing

It looks like a basket of… cabbage???
>Shut door


Posted in Fleet's Fiction, Microstory | Tagged , , , | 15 Comments

Status Update

Yesterday was not a particularly good day for the little Bat-Bear who lives here.  Between lingering pain all day and an unmanageable level of fatigue, none of my plans actually went anywhere.

But!  On these days, I feel like it is a good idea for me to write down the things that did go right and the things I want to get done today.  So!  Let us begin.

YESTERDAY
The Good:

  • I began reading a new book to be reviewed here hopefully no later than the start of next week
  • Even if I wasn’t productive on what I wanted to do, I was still actively doing something
  • I changed gears and began working on my second NaNo project (yes, a 50,000 word fanfic) to keep from burning out
  • I did some measure of study for one of today’s tests
  • I discovered that my fanfic is set in an era that’s going to be much easier to research than I had initially thought
  • I am maintaining and striving to maintain an active Twitter and blog presence

TODAY
The Goals:

  • Finish up the two running scenes in my fanfic to at least yesterday’s goal if not today’s
  • To not feel guilty if showering takes all of the spoons I have for the day, and just try to work harder tomorrow
  • Start again on Beast of Yucca Flats, even if that’s just getting down the narration for the next two scenes

There is another thing I wanted to add to my goals, but I think I’d better not until I see how this week goes.  If I am, in fact, able to keep up with both NaNo and my daily blogging AND homework and life things, then I will add that to next week’s status report.

Even if I only get one of those things done (or even none of them, but do accomplish something else), then I will remind myself that it is not a day wasted.  I’m enduring, and that’s what counts.

Posted in Fleet Gets Personal, Fleet Status Report | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Invisi(Dis)abilities

cw: ableism and mention of throwing up


It’s difficult living in an ableist world with invisible disabilities.

I have been in pain of some sort since I was a child.  I was ill frequently, with constant stomach pains and general feelings of malaise.  Stress made it all worse, and one year I was home from school so often, my parents got a call from the school asking about if I was skipping (with A+ grades, you’d think they wouldn’t be concerned).

At some point as I got older, I stopped mentioning these pains.  I stopped telling my parents that I didn’t feel good and how exhausting it was doing anything.  I figured everybody was like this.  I must not have been strong enough to deal with it like everyone else.

In college, it got worse.  I hurt.  I felt sick.  Every morning, I’d wake up so nauseated I didn’t think I could make it to class.  My stomach would clench inside and bloat with no tangible reason.  My muscles ached beyond what dance classes caused.

In my second year, I woke up with my first true migraine.

Bright lights and loud noises have always overstimulated me, but that day they were worse than ever.  I felt horrible.  I tried to eat a bagel before class, thinking perhaps some food would help settle my stomach.

I took maybe two bites before tossing it.

To reach my class from the café, I had to walk down half a block and cross a busy intersection that always had cars around.  As I stood there at 9-something in the morning, that fainting feeling returned.

Making it to the building was a miracle in itself.

My teacher was late, always one to come in on her own time but punish us if we followed suit.  I needed to speak with her.

I didn’t like this teacher from the get-go.  She was unnecessarily brusque and very demanding, whether we could perform what she wanted us to or not.

I asked to speak with her in the hallway.  My face was pale; I knew because I was cold.  I looked up at her and my head throbbed.  Florescent lights lined the hallways, on even during the daytime.

“I’m having a terrible migraine.  I don’t think I’m going to be able to perform, but I wanted to let you know ahead of time–”

“Did you eat something this morning?”

Oh.  Good.  She’s concerned about me.

“I had a bagel before I came her–”

“Did you brush your teeth today?”

I…  What?

I was so confused.  What did that have to do with anything?

“Y-yes?” I stuttered.

“You have food in your teeth.”

Um, thanks?  My vision’s going white, but OK.  Sure.  I probably did.

“When you’re in a scene like this,” she continued, talking about our Romeo and Juliet kissing scene, “you have to make sure your hygiene is top priority.  It’s not fair to your scene partner.”

What fresh hell was this?

I was standing there in front of her, visibly paling and losing strength until I needed to lean against the wall to talk to her, and she was talking about my teeth.

“No, I’m not feeling well.  I’ve got a migraine.”

“Take care of your mouth.  That’s why you don’t feel well.”

And she walked back into the classroom.

I couldn’t believe it.  I was standing there on the brink of passing out or throwing up or quite possibly both, and my teacher had ignored every word I’d said.

I stumbled my way back into the classroom.

Less than five minutes in, I was rushing out of the room to the toilets, my stomach more than ready to unswallow what little bagel and lot of stomach acid it had.

The tiles of the floor were cool.  I was very much not.

My head was swimming, everything felt like it was shifting around me, and all I could vomit was thin oily drainage from the back of my throat.  I shuddered all over, feeling somewhere between faint and dying.  I’d never been so sick before.

A few minutes later, my teacher entered the bathroom.

“You really are sick, huh?”

Well, whoop-di-fucking-do you finally figured that out.  It’s not as if my telling you I was feeling horribly ill was enough to convince you, no.  What would I, the person living in my own frail body, know about how it was doing?

Amazing.

Another student brought me my bag and said a get-well wish.  The moment I felt barely strong enough to stand, I did.  And got the hell out of there.

It was all I could do to just walk to my dorm.  I couldn’t call my parents.  I couldn’t think about anything.  Just the next step, the next slab of cement, the next driveway I passed.

With my last burst of energy, I made it to my room and closed up every window, turned off every light, pulled every curtain around my bed until the room was in as total darkness as I could make it.  Shuddering, I called home.

That was the first time in my life I’d ever been so sick that I feared for my life.  Maybe that was dramatic and there wasn’t anything to really fear, but I had never had something hit me so hard so fast.

The migraine lasted for three days.

Ever since then, migraines have been a part of my ongoing illnesses.  It’s a rare day when I don’t have one.  I told my mom about how the migraines have become a daily thing and she said, “I know.  I’ve had headaches since I was 17.”

I had no idea.

Because we’re taught not to talk about our illnesses, or if we’re not feeling well.  Everybody’s got problems, you should just pull yourself together and get on with things!  Sure, you’re in bed half the day with debilitating pain to the point you can’t think, but, let’s think about this:

Have you brushed your teeth today?


Posted in Fleet Gets Personal, Living with Disabilities | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

I Didn’t Make It For You

This is one of those things I’d never talk about on Tumblr and can’t get into much detail on Twitter, but I don’t particularly like comments on my fics.

This isn’t to say I hate all the comments I’ve received; that would be lying.  I’ve had some amazing comments sent to me, asking me about the world of my fic, yelling me a favorite line, or (my most prized comment) that my fic was so entertaining it brightened their day.  My one goal with anything I do is to entertain myself and then entertain others.  But I think the idea of writing fic specifically for oneself as opposed to for recognition isn’t one that’s really given much weight in the fanfic community (on Tumblr specifically, which is what I’ll be referring to when saying the fanfic community).

I started reading and writing fic on FanFiction.net, way back in the day (but after the Great Purge).  On FF.Net, there are five ways to say you enjoyed a fic:  favorite the story, follow the story, favorite the author, follow the author, and, finally, comment.  The most common reaction after reading fic there is to do one of the first four.

While following a one-shot may seem silly to the author with no inclination to continue, it says that the reader enjoys the fic enough that they want to see more.

Favoriting the author is a nice “Yes, I like your style or content and/or I want to save you for later” (though the latter not as much as favoriting a fic but we’ll get to that).  It’s also a nod of acknowledgement, a “You did a good” without speaking.

Favoriting a story is much stronger than simply favoriting the author.  Favorites are a treasured list, one you go to when you want to reread the fics you think of the most fondly.  A favorite on a story means “Wow, yes, this is a very good thing and I’m happy to read it over and over.”  It serves in a way like the bookmark function on AO3, saying to other readers, “Yes, I recommend this fic.”

Following an author is the most prized.  Even if you’re no longer posting to FF.Net, it really says, “Hey, when you post the next thing, and/or when you’re back, I’m gonna read it.”  It’s the notification that feels the best, because you know for sure you’ve entertained the reader and they’re eager for more (which is often a good incentive, I’ll  admit).

The ultimate reader reaction is doing all four.  There’s nothing like getting e-mail notifications that tell you several times that people liked your thing.

Comments, on the other hand, are fairly rare birds on FF.NET.  Some of that has to do with the typical age of the audience.  Writers and readers tend to skew on the young side, and it’s often the starting point for people new to fandom.

A good smattering of comments are the of the simple “I liked it/I lol’d/THAT WAS SOOOOOOO GOOD!!!!” variety.  The vast majority of comments tend to be “Write more plz!/Omg you can’t just leave it there/I need more!!!”, which are fine on their own, but do become grating after the tenth one on an explicitly stated one-shot.  Within those, there are also the deep comments, the comments that lay out exactly what they like, and…

the unasked-for critique.

It’s these comments that have turned me off exalting comments as the highest praise of a fic.  But we’ll get back to them.

A simple favorite on FF.NET, a like on Tumblr, a kudos on AO3–those are genuinely all I need to know people are enjoying my fics.  Not getting one of these on a story is more likely to disappoint me than not getting comments on one.

But there is a– I hesitate to say “trend” with the connotation that tends to imply– very big push around Tumblr for comments.  This in itself isn’t a bad thing.  I know I’m the tiny minority who’s generally ambivalent on comments.  The thing that IS bad about this push is the level of guilt thrown around from it.

“You’ll reblog art, but you won’t reblog fic!” is a strong contestant for first place in the Maybe-If-I-Guilt-Trip-You-Enough-You’ll-Do-What-I-Say department for several reasons.  The first being, that’s always been the nature of fandom.

It’s definitely not a good one, but let’s face it:  fanart is generally easier to see and process quickly, and without much thought.  That’s not to say people don’t wind up gushing over a mediocre effort (see the initial “His head is pastede on”) or put lots of thought into looking at a piece of art, but in general it’s much simpler and less time-consuming to take in a picture than read.  (Not to mention that artists are still looking for reblogs, but that’s for someone else to write about; I’m a writer, not a visual artist.)

Second, there is no faster way to convince people to NOT reblog something than to imply or outright state that they’re a bad person for not doing so.  It holds as true for “well-intentioned” PSAs as it does for holding fics to ransom until a certain number of comments are reached.  People do not want to listen to you spout off about how unfair X thing is with heaps of guilt thrown in for flavor, especially when they might have already been considering doing the thing you want them to do.

The next big argument, and what I personally think is the real winner of the MIIGTYEYDWIS (that really needs a shorter acronym) competition, is “Without comments, I feel I should just stop writing.”

Now, on one hand, I know a lot of incredibly good writers who feel this way and I know it’s a very strong thing to feel (to these writers, btw, I give you all gentle pats and I’m always ready to cheer your fic on).  On the other hand, this is very much an “I’ll just take my ball and go home” scenario.

Saying that you’ll quit with a low comment count can boost the amount of comments you get, for a short while.  Mostly, though, your readers will think that they are now obligated to leave comments, even if they don’t have anything to say, and feel pressured to do so, as if you’ll wither away without their specific praise.

That’s a bad place to be as a reader.  It sets up a bad relationship between the author and the reader, and can be especially stressful to those who already have difficulty commenting even when they really want to.  It also hurts the author, as the comments received tend to become more rote than genuine, more “I like it very much” than “Wow, X thing had me going, omg I’m so hooked.”

It’s a lose-lose situation the whole way, with each party only giving part of what they could.

Now, I have no problems with writers talking about how much it hurts not to receive comments.  It confuses me, sure, but that’s like me being asexual:  I just don’t get the appeal, but it’s a personal thing.  Not getting the feedback or response you had hoped for is always upsetting (believe me, I know the feeling, and if anyone says they don’t, they’re lying).  But there are ways to get readers to comment without guilting them into it, just as there are ways for readers to start commenting more than just by rote.

The way NOT to do it is by writing and reblogging endless PSAs about how comments are the blessed words of angels and anyone not leaving them wants you to fail as a person.  Not only does it get old, it gets irritating, and then it gets people mad.

Now, coming waaaay back around to the middle of my point, there is a kind of comment that I swear has been picking up speed since the “comment forever” posts really kicked in, and that is my loathed critique comment.

Folks, the only time you should leave a “helpful critique” comment is when the author specifically states that they want one.  Otherwise, it’s not helpful, it’s annoying as fuck, especially when your critique is answered in the author’s note already.

Recently, I received a comment on an original fic snippet I posted for my Hallowrite challenge.  At first, I was happy.  Someone actually read it!  I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea (especially as a generally happytime Batfamily writer and original fic never gets as many responses as fanfic), so I was thrilled to see someone liked it enough to do something to it.  I was hoping for a generic “Really interesting/Can’t wait to see more/Nice” comment, the kind that just tells me someone read it, like a longer kudos.  But here’s what I got:

That was pretty short, but it seems like it’s off to a good start! If I may offer some advice? Don’t be afraid to flesh out the dialog a little more, as one of the most important aspects of horror stories is the buildup, and even if we can kind of predict what’s going to happen, the anticipation is what makes it all so worth it! I really like your premise though (especially since this seems to be set in a Mexican/Latin American locale), so I do hope you’ll continue with this story in the future!

Now, here’s a tip:  When writing a “helpful” comment, lead with what you like about the story.  Put your ideas for what you’d like for it after, then end on a brief reiteration that you like it.  Do NOT lead with your critique, not even if you’re asked for one.  The order I listed is the best way to get your critique heard to welcoming ears.

That said, I did not ask for any critique.  I didn’t ask for any comment.  I simply put my story up there because I wrote it for my challenge.

The main reason this comment bothers me to no end, however, is that it tells me this commenter didn’t actually read everything I wrote.  Here in the author’s note, I specifically say why this is the way it is:

I’ve been wanting to write a vampire series with an all-girl gang of vampires being just as vicious as vampires were historically (as opposed to deeply misunderstood lovers or whatever’s going on now). This is just a bit of it; I had wanted to write more, but I figured a small bit now would be better for this prompt series. Hopefully I’ll get more of them up soon!

It is a small bit, not a finished work, just enough of a story to fill my prompt and hopefully get me in the mood to write some more of it.  It’s a vignette of what I hope to make a longer story, but not the entire thing.  Yes, I know it’s short; I wrote it.  I’m not strictly writing a horror piece, I’m writing a character- and world-introduction snippet.  I neither want nor need your advice, because I’m not planning on continuing in the near future; I have too many other projects going for that.

Here’s the thing:  I don’t tend to ask for advice on stories and fics for anything.  I’m an editor first and foremost, and once the initial writing is done, I can go over it and easily see what needs correcting, expanding, or cutting.  That’s what I do.

When I post a fic, it is exactly how I want it to be read.  I genuinely don’t care how you, the reader, think it should have gone.  Write your own version; I genuinely love the idea of fanfic of fanfic.  But don’t come into my inbox saying how you think X should have been done differently; or Y should have had a different reaction; or, most bizarrely, tell me my fic should use Z other trope (see my Ra’s/Dick story being read as an a/b/o fic when in no place had I ever claimed it to be).

Comments on the whole don’t mean that much to me.  It doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy most of them when they’re there, but they hold no special meaning to me, no goal I need to obtain.  They do what they do and they’re very good things for a lot of people.  But don’t go around commenting with your unasked-for and unwanted advice on fics.  Don’t send the endless repetitions of “More!”  Don’t give me twelve paragraphs of questions that are clearly going to be answered in the rest of the story.  (Yes, all of these are actual comments I have received and they’re not including the one above.)

But most of all, remember the title of this piece.

I Didn't Make Him For YOU


This is part of the November Write-A-Day challenge from Yeah Write

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A+ Notes

These are the notes I took for an assignment in my Intro to Outlook class.  They speak so much about me, I feel.


Instructions:  Research the various Email message formats (Lesson 1 on page 31 has a small section on this but you will want to expand your research to the Internet as well) and compare and contrast them. Submit the assignment as a word file format attachment

Plain text:  fucking bullshit.  Can’t do a damn thing with it.  Just fuckin’ text.  Gets through anti-virus blocks easier.  Loads fast.

Good for getting things out and there.  Like, you wanna make sure this shit opens for realsies and opens hella fast?  Gotta go with the old school plain text.  But you can’t do jack with it, so use it with HTML as like a last attempt.

HTML:  what everyone fucking uses.  Can do text formatting.  It’s the standard.  Why the fuck not, bro?  Takes pictures, text, and hyperlinks.  Don’t let that rich text shit tell you it can’t.

Sends shit across the fucking Internet.  Y’know, the thing everyone fucking uses?  Can handle all fucking kinds of images and shit, including gifs.  It uses a link to where image is stored, but keeps file sizes hella smol.  Literally the best shit to use. This shit’s hella versatile.

Rich Text:  the douchebag of the message formatting world.  Some bullshit Microsoft pulled out of its ass to be all ~~different~~ and shit.  Fucking waste.  Works with only new versions of their shitty Exchange shit and Outlook.  What a fucking tool.

This motherfucker on the other hand can’t do jack.  Originally started as a fucking file format until it got replaced by doc and shit, it got canned and turned into the crap it is now.  Can’t load gifs, audio, or video, but has the fucking audacity to think it’s better because it embeds the image right in the file.  Nah, man, all it does is bump up the file size and fuck everyone over.  It stores typed documents and fuck all else.


This is the sign of a Grade-A paper, my friends.

Posted in Commission Examples, School Stuff | Tagged , , | 2 Comments